The Other Side of Enough

THE OTHER SIDE OF ENOUGH  How many times have you been told you’re too much? You’re extra? You need to reel it in? Tone it down? I’ve heard these messages from teachers, dance and cheer coaches, high school musical directors, flight attendants (OK, so that one’s on me), and former partners throughout my life. 

My response was to apologize, play small, and question why I am the way I am. Sorry for laughing too loud, for being too expressive, for taking up too much space. All of these sorries and apologies add up over time, though, and we find ourselves using apologetic language constantly. Our language informs our feelings and behavior. 

I hear it from my clients—“Oh, sorry about that”—apologizing for getting emotional or for thinking they’ve veered the conversation off course (they haven’t).

What I say back is this: We do not apologize here. We do not say sorry. What needed to come out during this session needed to come out. Let it ALL out. 

A small language switch can lead to BIG changes in confidence. Instead of apologizing for running late, switch it to, “Thank you for your patience!” And in a lot of instances, simply remove “so sorry.” 

The world does not want a watered-down version of you. The world wants robust, technicolor, vibrant you. The biggest gift you can give yourself and to the world is to be the MOST YOU you can be. And if she’s loud, expressive, and takes up space, I say HELL F**KING YES. LET’S GO. 

So, no, you’re not too much or too extra. You are the perfect amount of you. #bestfeelingforever